


My Little Butterfly

by NarryEm



Series: One Direction Erotica/Fluff-fest/Wangst as written by EmilyY [16]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-31
Updated: 2013-10-31
Packaged: 2017-12-31 00:37:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1025276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NarryEm/pseuds/NarryEm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is autistic and Liam is his step-brother. Harry seems to have an obsession with butterflies.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>Warning: derogatory terms for autistic people, I apologize for that </i></p>
            </blockquote>





	My Little Butterfly

**Author's Note:**

> Gotta thank ZiallTops from Wattpad for writing the ever so wonderful and beautiful _Louder Than Lions_! This was inspired by the series :3  
>  And I'm sorry if the spacing bothers you. I can never get it right on AO3, haha

Harry was abandoned as a child. When he was ten months old and began to show signs of autism, his mother was heartbroken. It was bad enough that her bastard of a boyfriend had knocked her up in high school, but her firstborn was a retard as well? So on a particularly warm November morning, she went down to Wolverhampton Orphanage and put Harry’s carrier on the steps.

Later that morning, when the morning staff came outside to collect newspaper, she was greeted by the sight of a toddler curled up inside a cheap carrier, a letter tucked in beside the toddler.  
The letter read:

 

‘To whomever finds Harry,

First and foremost, I would like to apologise and also thank you for this inconvenience. I’m only seventeen and am not mentally nor physically ready for a child, especially one who is autistic. I’ve begun to suspect that my kid has autism, and I am in no condition to raise him. Working two full-time jobs to support him has been difficult enough, and I feel like I cannot afford to give him sufficient care and attention to take good care of him.

His name is Harry; Harry Edward Styles. I gave him his father last name as he at least deserves to know who that was. He’s a smart kid, I can already see that.

Again, thank you so much for this.

 

Sincerely, Anne.’

 

The worker, Lou, took Harry inside. The other nurses and caretakers cooed over their newest addition, taking a liking to his evident chocolate curls and dimpled grin even as he slept.

Soon, Harry became the unanimous favourite object of adoration in the orphanage. Of course, they aren’t supposed to have favourite kids, but sometimes thing happen for a reason, right? The other kids don’t seem to mind as they are as equally devoted to the curly haired angels as the grown-ups are. It’s inevitable, really. The time he is awake, his green eyes are so wide, impossibly wide as if he doesn’t want to miss a thing that happens around him.

 

Before they know, he has everyone wrapped around his tiny, pale finger.

 

-

 

 

The year Harry turns five is the year his life changes for the better.

Well, maybe that first trip to the nearby playground notwithstanding.

 

It goes like this: humans can be disgusting creatures, we really can be. We like to pick out those who are different, special, distinguished, whatever you want to label them. Then we like to pick on them. Call them names, tease them in a hurting way, and cast them out.

It’s how humankind has learnt to thrive, as tragic as it is.

The moment the other kids on the playground figure out that Harry is autistic and not as quick with his thoughts, they start to push him around. They call him names like ‘retard’, ‘tardy’, ‘slow poke’ and worse. Thankfully, one of the parents hear that and calls him out on it, explaining why he was being bad.  
Harry doesn’t understand why the other brunet was being scolded. He was all wide green eyes and pouty red lips as Lou took him and other orphans back home.

 

Anyways, a few weeks after Harry’s fifth birthday, a family comes to visit. It’s a familiar sight, really. Once in a while, the local families bring their kids to the orphanage so that their kids can interact with the orphans while the parents either look up the adoption process or talk about bank transfers and such for donations.  
Today, a curly haired boy with doe-brown eyes comes with his parents and two sisters. The sisters jet straight off to the girls’ wing, leaving Liam alone in the entrance hallway. Lou kindly redirects the curly brunet to the boys’ wing, where several of them are already out to play.

Liam’s eyes quickly settle on Harry. Wow, he has the same hair as he, except really, really darker! Liam runs up, not thinking because what six-year-old does? Harry wails, startled by the sudden movement. He despises when people touch him without permission, especially if they are not the nurses he’s known for all his life. Harry’s eyes start to water and Liam—bless his empathetic heart—starts to cry with him.  
Lou is never far away from Harry, so hearing not one but two kids crying, she hurries over to coo in their ears and calm them down. She has to tell Liam about how little Harry is easily scared and that he needs to be slow and gentle with him. 

Quarter of an hour later, Harry has yet another human being fawning over him. You can’t really call it fawning either since Liam feels this inexplicable brotherly pull towards Harry. Although he has only has barely five months on the younger boy, Liam wants to protect Harry from everything.

So when Karen announces that they are getting a new brother, by the name of Harry, Liam is very happy. And it seems that Harry is too, which is a rare occasion in and by itself since Harry isn’t keen on showing his emotions.  
(Once, Lou gave him a haircut that was perhaps a little too short and a little too asymmetrical but Harry hadn’t said a word on it.)

On the way home, after heaps and heaps of legal documents to sign and initial, Harry and Liam are sat in the back, back seat of the minivan. Harry has fallen asleep, his head lolling gently with each little dip and curve of the road and his hands are inching closer and closer to Liam’s. Liam’s moments away from falling asleep as well, but he does feel it when Harry’s small pale fingers intertwine with his timidly.

 

-

 

Harry likes the new home.

He has his own room now and he never liked sharing his old room with three other kids. (Not just because William had smelly socks) The new room has a soft, plush bed with velvety blue sheets. It’s covered with toy airplane patterns but Harry doesn’t like it quite much. He remembers how one of the girls at the orphanage had a blanket covered in butterflies. He likes butterflies; they are so small but so magnificent. Shimmery, colourful and pretty. They tried telling him that boys mustn't like things like butterflies but Harry likes them nonetheless. Once, he drew a blue butterfly on his wrist with a Sharpie but when Karen saw it, she freaked out, not that Harry noticed. She then gently told him that he could draw butterflies on himself anywhere but his wrists because they could be misunderstood.

 

Liam likes his new brother. Growing up with two sisters, they had always tried to feminize him, like jokingly put on makeup on him and dress him up in frilly shirts. Now that the gender ratio has evened out, Liam has more of a back-up.  
But Harry is so pretty; there really is no other way to describe his adoptive brother. His milky pale skin is like a drop of moonlight under the midnight sky, his green eyes brighter than polished emerald gemstone. And he has got these red full lips that are very much like a girl's. Liam giggles because he recals kissing a girl in his class under the desk during an earthquake drill. The teacher hadn't noticed and that's what made it even more exciting. Harry also has excellent mannerisms and speaks little. But when he does talk, it's slow and reluctant, like he doesn't want to let the world hear his beautiful voice. Liam thinks that Harry should talk more often because he has got the nicest voice Liam's ever heard.

Shortly after Harry has settled in, Liam becomes more active in their interactions. He offers to start a movie when they are lazing about on the weekends, pick out books together, and play with his Toy Story figurines. Harry never shows much interest in the Disney stuff, nonetheless, he does play with Liam with full joy.

 

About a month after Harry was introduced to the Payne family, Karen decides that the best course of action would be for Harry to attend school. She wants him to attend the same school as Liam and thankfully, the school has special classes for the autistic or otherwise mentally different children.

First day of school, Harry doesn't want to go to his class. He has bonded with Liam so much in the past few weeks that he follows the older boy around everywhere. He actually cries when the bell goes and his assistant [teacher [at least that's how we do it in my school] tugs at his elbow gently for him to go. Upon seeing the first few tears streaming down Harry's fair skin, Liam steps forward to press a short sweet kiss on his brow; he has never done that before but it feels natural. Harry calms down somewhat at the touch, letting himself be taken away.

 

"I'll see you at recess!" Liam calls out, joining up with his other friends once more.

Recess could not have come sooner in Harry's opinion. The moment the bell goes, all the kids clamour at the door to get to the playground outside the fastest. Not Harry, though. He waits for his brother to come pick him up and in a minute, Liam walks through the door. He has got a big grin plastered on his face, holding a brown paper bag. He holds out his hand for the curly haired boy to take it and Harry follows him outside.  
There are snacks inside the bag, Karen having entrusted Liam with the food. Cheese strings and an apple for each boy. Harry doesn't eat much other than half-hearted nibbles at his apple. Liam frowns on it but makes no verbal comment.

"How d'you like the school?" Liam asks, both of them sat on a swing set.  


"Alright," Harry mumbles, facing the ground.  


 

"Can you please look at me when we talk? You have pretty eyes."  


 

Harry turns his big green eyes towards Liam. "Pretty? Like a girl?"

 

Liam blushes because Harry is echoing his opinions. "Maybe. Boys can be pretty too."

 

"Pretty like butterflies."

 

"Prettier than butterflies." Liam moves his swing closer to Harry so that he can pet the soft chocolate curls. Soft and bouncy, and so _Harry._

 

Harry giggles. He has seen people make this gesture with their dogs. "Am I your dog?"

 

Liam is baffled. "Why would you think that?"

 

"People pet dogs."

 

"So I can't pet my brother's pretty hair?"

 

"You can always pet my hair, Li."

Now that's a shocker. Harry almost never addresses people by their names, much less nicknames. Sure, he must have heard others call Liam Li or shorthand but no one would have expected Harry to use the endearment himself.

"Thanks . . . Hazza." Liam manages after a too-long silence.

 

"Hazza?" Harry's green eyes glint with confusion.  


 

"It's your nickname, Harry!"  


 

"Okay!"

The smile that Harry gives Liam is quite positively the most beautiful one he has ever seen.

 

-

 

High school proves to be more difficult than elementary.  


 

First off, the slight age gap, by unwritten social rules, means that it is unacceptable for Liam to hang out with Harry. Harry who idolizes him completely. Harry whom he loves more than he should as a (adoptive) brother.

Harry doesn't seem to mind that much as he has made himself a friend, Niall. The blond kid is all smiles and rosy cheeks. He isn't in any of Harry's classes, per se, but they have bumped into each other in the empty music room after school. Niall sings and plays the guitar and Harry loves to sing. They are quite the handful, those two though. Karen is just happy that Harry has a friend other than Liam, his own brother.

Liam doesn't know why, but he doesn't quite like seeing Niall and Harry huddled close together, discussing music and whatnot. The first time Harry and Niall go to the cinema by themselves. Liam feels hurt. Normally, Niall would think to include Liam in their plans but not this time. They up and left after asking for Karen's permission.

That night, Liam goes over to Zayn's to party with him and Louis without his parents' knowing. To them, he tells them that it's just a sleepover. Liam really doesn't like the foul smell of alcohol nor should he drink it--considering his kidney health. But he does in the heat of the moment and goes as far as snogging a lion-haired bloke whose name Liam forgets the moment their lips part. The crowd around them whoop and Louis claps him on the back, congratulating him on his 'embarking on gay adventure'. Liam responds promptly with a choke-hold, at which Louis snorts out more laughter and jeers.

That night may be the night Liam realises that maybe, he's not entirely into girls.

 

-

 

A couple years down the road, Liam is sure that yes, he is bisexual with more of a tendency for blokes. Preferably with shaggy or curly hair. And with non-brown eyes. And with pouty red lips and beautifully pale skin.

Liam knows that he is treading dangerous grounds now. This fantasy of his is downright incest, isn't it? You aren't supposed to want to kiss your little brother anywhere close to his mouth! Yet every time he presses his lips to Harry's soft cheek in a comforting manner, he finds himself wanting to inch closer to those full red lips.

Niall has ended up becoming a constant factor in their lives, always attached to Harry's hips. Sometimes, Liam sees the blond kissing Harry on the cheek or the nose of the back of his hand for longer that necessary. Maybe he's not the only who has fallen for Harry's eyes and his innate charm. After all, a lot of the kids at school like Harry.

 

Of course, there still are those bullies who have to exist at school.

Whenever Liam or Niall isn't around to shield Harry, those low-life bullies never fail to find Harry and insult him: calling him retard, turtle, the likes. Harry never reacts externally, nods on by without raising a brow. But when he's alone with either of his friends, he tells them what happened, a tear or two escaping his eyes.

It must have been one of those days when Liam sees something out of the ordinary. Niall has his arms slung around Harry's broad shoulders, leant in and foreheads touching. It looks like Niall is whispering reassurance in Harry's ears as their bodies are angled towards each other. Just as Liam is about to walk past the door--intending to close it--Niall deliberately loses his balance. Their lips brush and for a nanosecond, a triumphant smile finds its way to Niall's soft pink lips.

Something that feels uncomfortably like jealousy sears up inside of Liam.

Harry is frozen to his spot, not moving a muscle. Niall panics and says, "Crap. Sorry, Harry. I thought--god what was I thinkin'? It's stupid, please forget it ever happened!"

 _Yes, please do_ , Liam thinks sulkily.

Then Harry just bolts out the room, zipping past Liam and thus exposing him.

"Crap! Liam--"

Liam doesn't hear the rest of it because he is already following Harry. For once, it's Liam following Harry.

It's not hard to track Harry down. Harry likes the comfort of his own room best. His favourite hobby is to draw butterflies of different species and sizes all over his wall--painted with some off-white paint that creates a smooth canvas for the young boy. 

Harry isn't drawing nor is he staring at his previous creations. Cautiously and slowly, Liam walks over the threshold and closes the door behind him silently.

"Niall kissed me," Harry states simply and emotionlessly.  


 

"He did." Liam says back for the lack of better way to say it.  


 

"Was okay," the younger of the two shrugs.  


 

"So you liked it?" Liam inquires, venom snaking its way into his tone.  


 

"Was okay." Harry repeats.  


 

Silence fills the air between them. After what seems like eons, Harry reveals, "Niall's the first one to kiss me."  


 

"First boy or first person?" Liam asks, hoping for the first option.  


 

Harry giggles. "First person."

Liam can feel his heart sink. No, he mustn't feel that way. Seventeen years old and in love with his adopted brother, what a nice story. "That's great, Haz. Sweet sixteen, yeah?"  


 

"Yeah."

 

God, why couldn't Liam be the first?

 

-

 

Thankfully (Liam chides himself for being such a horrible person) Niall and Harry's friendship never gets past the occasionally kissing stage. Sure, normal mates don't do that but neither of them seems to mind.

But lately, they seem more secretive. Liam can never manage to hear what they are whispering about as they cease all conversations as soon as Liam is withing twenty feet radius. Niall can look as much of an innocent angel as he wants, but Liam can sense that something's up.

 

-

 

The summer before Liam's graduation year, their family takes a trip to the Disney World in Florida. Liam is excited because although it's a very kid-like thing to do, he adores Disney. He doesn't mind the long flight because it's an excuse to cuddle with Harry. Harry hates travelling and has trouble sleeping unless he is snuggled with someone. Liam gladly volunteers to be seated next to his brother for the entire journey. He doesn't care that he can scarcely feel his left shoulder by the time they land.

 

-

 

A week later, they are coming back to England with slightly more tanned skins, abundant memories, and tonnes and tonnes of souvenirs. Harry is quite happy since he had found a shop that carried merchandise with butterflies on them alongside Mickey and Minnie the Mouse. Liam thinks that maybe he should start calling Harry butterfly with all his devotion.

The flight back is pretty much the same, except this time Liam has to carry Harry to their car since he won't wake up. Even the hour-long car ride back home doesn't wake him up so Liam has to carry him up to his room as well.

As Liam lowers Harry onto his bed, Harry tightens his grip on Liam, refusing to go onto his own bed. Liam struggles to detach himself from Harry as he is desperate for some shut-eye. But no, Harry is remarkably strong and Liam has no choice but to sigh in defeat and settle himself on the bed as well.  
Liam's breathing gradually slows down and a part of his half-unconscious brain registers the fact that Harry's hands are pliant and loose, allowing Liam's escape However, Liam is so sleepy and Harry smells so good . . . too good and comfy.

 

Liam wakes up to the feeling of something soft under his chin. It turns out to be Harry's dark chocolate curls and for a moment, Liam is puzzled. Then his memories come back so he relaxes back into his calmness from before.

Harry's still asleep, his long lashes feathered out. His gorgeous curls are fanned out on the pillow and mussed from sleep. His long, slim fingers and interlocked on top of his chest, rising and falling with each breath. A faint pink is tinting his cheeks, giving him a much younger appearnace.

Without thinking, Liam props himself up on his elbows, face too close to Harry's.

It's just that Harry looks so adorable and so angel-like in his sleep. He sure can beat Niall at looking utterly innocent in his sleep, all pouty lips and soft hair that Liam wants to caress.

So he does that. And before he knows it, his lips are caressing Harry's.

_Shit, fuck, no. Where's the rewind!_

Liam jerks back, ashamed of his lack of self-control. He has to leave _now_.

He sits upright and starts to stand up, only to be pulled back onto the bed.  
"Why're you leaving, Li?" Harry asks, groggy-voiced.

Liam dares to turn around. Harry is rubbing the sleeping out of his emerald orbs, bottom lip poking out a tiny bit. 

 

"I'm hungry." Liam says the first thing that comes to his mind.

 

"Can't kiss and leave me. That's what Niall says."

 

_How dare Harry mention Niall._

 

"Well, I'm not Niall."

 

"'Course not! You're Li. My Li." Harry giggles.

 

"Pardon?"

 

"You're my Li, Li."

 

"Then you're my Haz."

 

"Whose am I then?"

 

Liam can feel his eyebrows furrow. "I thought you fancied Niall."

 

"No silly. Niall and I kiss only because I wanted to practice for you! Silly Li."

_What_

"I wanted to kiss you good, Li." Harry says so nonchalantly, so innocently. (Liam realizes he must have thought aloud) 

 

"I've wanted to kiss you too, Haz. I . . . I love you."

 

"I love you too, Li."

Liam smiles as he leans forward closer and closer to Harry's lips. "My little butterfly," he murmurs softly before his lips are on Harry's. 

 

"Your little butterfly."

They kiss again and this time, Liam isn't guilty. He can do this; he can do this for Harry and for himself.

 


End file.
